Thursday 27 May 2010

Sausages and Brian Coleman

When it comes down to it, the London Borough of Barnet is just a little bit too full of people who are just a little bit too puffed up with their own sense of self importance and just a little too lacking in a sense of humour. Sadly, having failed in most other walks of life, they enter local politics and end up making decisions which have a huge effect on peoples lives. It is something I like to refer to as Esther Rantzen syndrome. Esther Rantzen made her name presenting a program called "Thats Life". It was a mildly humourous program which was on TV in the late 1970's. It was probably the first program to champion consumer rights and give the common man in the street 2 minutes of fame. It featured Richard Stilgoe who would play the piano and sing funny ditties, they would go out on the street and do vox pop shots. It got OK viewing figures until one day they struck lucky. They featured a dog which could say "Sausages". This was an overnight sensation. Everyone suddenly loved That's Life and Esther Rantzen. Viewing figures shot through the roof. Esther Rantzen for a while was hot property.

Now whilst the only thing the vast majority of people wanted to see was the dog saying Sausages, Esther Rantzen thought that the success was down to her personal brilliance. For a while, it was my favourite show, purely because a dog saying sausages was rather funny. Sadly for Esther, she never really got the fact that talking dogs make great TV. She never really got the fact that if the dog could have presented the whole show, then it would have been the greatest show ever, anywhere.

It is rather like the numerous politicians in Barnet who think they have been elected because they are the bees knees. They are really the Esther Rantzen to their party, which is the talking dog saying "Sausages". Sure some of them have a personal following, but how many would have been elected had they stood as independents? I don't begrudge them their success at the polls. I don't begrudge them their allowances, but it does make me laugh when the Brian Colemans of this world say that "The residents party where humiliated" or similar comments. I wonder how many votes Coleman would get as an independent or as a residents party candidate?

Did he write the Tory Manifesto which got him elected? He's just been appointed as Cabinet minister in Barnet for the Environment and he can't even stick to the manifesto he was elected on, ditching the commitments to the Green Belt and saying "My priority is roads, roads, roads". The likes of Brian Coleman really don't get it, do they?

Just as TV has moved on from the days when a dog saying sausages would get you 20 million viewers, sooner or later the voters of Barnet and Camden will tire of the Tory party. Mr Coleman is currently GLA rep for Camden and Barnet. In two years time, I wonder whether the public will be quite so keen on him, as Tory cuts bite. I doubt that even a dog saying "Sausages" will save him. Maybe I'll buy myself a Parrot, train it to say "Colemans got to go" and see if I can get a TV slot. I've tried to train the dog to say it, but she just looks at me like I'm an idiot (she's probably right).

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