Sunday 23 November 2008

"We ain't got nothing to hide" - Barnet Council's twelve nightmares

Being a music obsessed Punk rocker, I was rather amused to note that an ageing hippy seems to have joined the Barnet blogging scene. There have been various comments left on some of the local blogs by a certain "Dr Sardonicus". Now whilst I have no idea who Barnet's Dr Sardonicus may be, he is clearly a lover of late 1960's psychedelic rock music. The "12 dreams of Dr Sardonicus" was an album by psychedelic rock ensemble Spirit. Being vaguely aware of the album, I thought I'd refresh my acquaintance with the album and see why Dr Sardonicus had chosen his handle to comment on the political scene in Barnet. As a staring point I did a Wikipedia search (check HERE for the full details).

What amused me, was looking through the tracklist of the album, maybe we have a rather good commentary on the situation in Barnet. Maybe Dr Sardonicus has found his own "Da Vinci code" revelations in the Album. Here's my take on what he may have uncovered.

1. "Prelude – Nothin' to Hide"

The album opens with "Nothin' to Hide". Those of us who read the Barnet Council Watch story about Leo Bolands trip to Boston (click HERE) will see that this song is really one that Mike Freer should download and listen to.

2. "Nature's Way"

Well given the council's plan to transform the Sanders Way nature reserve into a two lane highway, maybe Councillor Harper should have a listen to this gem and reconsider this policy.

3. "Animal Zoo"

I must say that my recent trip up to the council meeting certainly reminded me a bit of this song. The way that all of the Tories manage to put their hand up to pass motion after motion congratulating themselves, certainly reminded me of the Sheep enclosure I visited at Queensland Zoo last year.

4. "Love Has Found a Way"

Well seeing some of the husband and wife teams on the council ( Tambourides, Palmers,etc) maybe there is something to be said for standing for council (other than the allowances).

5. "Why Can't I Be Free?"

This seems to be the Song Mike Freer's Leader Listens blog should be singing. Unlike everyone else's blog it costs the taxpayer £400.

6. "Mr. Skin"

Now clearly this is about Brian Coleman and it's full title should be Mr Thick Skin, following his latest column in the Barnet Press where he claims that his life is intolerable having to attend so many banquets, eat so much dinner and drink so much wine, at other peoples expense.

7. "Space Child"

Given that there are two stories in the Edgware Times (Click HERE and HERE) about major finds of Cannabis in Edgware this week, could it be that we are living in the new Ashbury Height? It certainly seems that the Barnet Drug and Alcohol service seem to think so with their scheme to roll out an incentive program for drug users (click HERE to read about this)

8. "When I Touch You"

This is clearly about the council's reverse midas touch. It seems that everything we read about them involves cost overruns, late delivery and poor service.

9. "Street Worm"

Could this be a reference to the many instances of playing fields being closed by the council, resulting in large groups of kids having nowhere to go and hanging around on street corners? Pavillion way being the latest example of this shameful policy.

10. "Life Has Just Begun"

Clearly a reference to our outgoing Chief executive, Leo Boland and his new job at the GLA on a salary of £210,000. It seems the nice business class trip to Boston for a leadership course(at our expense) has opened a whole new set of doors for him.

11. "Morning Will Come"

A song about the next election and the hope that maybe there is a change at the top of the Council.

12. "Soldier"

A song about the Council's plans to build yet another mini city on the site of the former Inglis Barracks at Mill Hill east, without thinking about the strain on schools, doctors, hospitals etc.

13. "Rougher Road"

Well as the interest from Icelandic banks was paying for the road resurfacing program, it looks like this is what we can expect in Barnet in years to come. Viva Mike Freer and his Midas touch with our cash.

14. "Red Light Roll On (Additional Single)" *

Now this can only be about our favourite Councillor Brian Coleman and his column amongst all the adds for brothels in the Barnet Press. When a Lib Dem asked him if he was going to ask the paper it writes a column for, whether they would follow the example of the Times and ban the Sex services ads, Coleman replied "Red Light Roll on" (Well actually he said "No" but it means the same thing doesn't it.

So there you go. I've no idea whether Dr Sardonicus had this in mind when he made his posts, but it certainly seems to be that he's hit the nail on the head. Now you may say "How come 14 tracks on the 12 dreams album?" Well unlike the 8% of Council reserve funds Barnet have lost, it seems with Spirit you got 16% extra free.

If anyone else out there reading this knows of any other obscure 1960's Psychedelic concept albums, predicting the shenanigans of Barnet Council, I'd love to here from you !

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